Not sure what to do about my story now.
I have edited it and feel that l would like to post it on screen but would it not be better to put the edited version on first followed by the endings 1 and 2.
Don't know how to go about that - any suggestions.
Thursday, 3 June 2010
Tuesday, 18 May 2010
ENDING No. 2
I opened the bedroom door as quietly as l could trying my best not to wake Jennifer. As it opened l peeped in to check she was still asleep "poor kid" l thought, "all she's been through in her young life"
.
I slowly reached over for her coat and shoes desperatley trying to be quiet. I wanted to clean her shoes and brush up her jacket for tomorrow's interview at Rock Ferry High school.
I managed to grab both items and closed the door silently.
As I made my way down stairs her jacket slipped from my grasp and tumbled down the stairs step after step it fell until it landed in a pile near the bottom. I raced after it and picked it up. As l did a note fell from the pocket and when it landed I recognised the note as a prescription. I immediatley thought that Jennifer was on medication and as a chemist i thought it best to check and make sure so she had enough of whatever she needed.
But this prescription was months old and never been cashed.
It was for very strong antibiotics the likes of which are used for people with pneumoina.
Did'nt my sister die of pneumonia!
This prescription was made out in her name. Why was it never cashed?
.
I slowly reached over for her coat and shoes desperatley trying to be quiet. I wanted to clean her shoes and brush up her jacket for tomorrow's interview at Rock Ferry High school.
I managed to grab both items and closed the door silently.
As I made my way down stairs her jacket slipped from my grasp and tumbled down the stairs step after step it fell until it landed in a pile near the bottom. I raced after it and picked it up. As l did a note fell from the pocket and when it landed I recognised the note as a prescription. I immediatley thought that Jennifer was on medication and as a chemist i thought it best to check and make sure so she had enough of whatever she needed.
But this prescription was months old and never been cashed.
It was for very strong antibiotics the likes of which are used for people with pneumoina.
Did'nt my sister die of pneumonia!
This prescription was made out in her name. Why was it never cashed?
Thursday, 13 May 2010
Today was as usual, an exciting workshop with lots of advice and comments regarding our stories. I was really glad to be able to read mine aloud so that the group could comment on it. I have now arrived at two endings, both of which I like, but the idea is that I can post it on my blog and let the reader decide. A liitle collaborative partcipation can always be useful. That way my story could work for a lot longer especially if people begin to write their own endings, which would be even better.
Must ask Elaine how this is done, or even Jensen who was missed today. Hope we see you next week!
Its so useful to play around with these ideas in our group because we are all so supportive of each other and led by two extremly compentant people who dont find a problem with anything " everything appears do-able" even down to Doreen creating a new word today ominosity!! really likeing that one
Must ask Elaine how this is done, or even Jensen who was missed today. Hope we see you next week!
Its so useful to play around with these ideas in our group because we are all so supportive of each other and led by two extremly compentant people who dont find a problem with anything " everything appears do-able" even down to Doreen creating a new word today ominosity!! really likeing that one
Monday, 10 May 2010
Life and technology can be so unfair.
http://riverview17a.blogspot.com dont give up Dot we are all there to help if you need us.
http://riverview17a.blogspot.com dont give up Dot we are all there to help if you need us.
Tunnel tales
The web weaver is industrious in her thoughts.
These images provoke memory.
Now your walking in my shoes. Those images really appeal to me and I have no idea why. Industrial ruins..http://tunneltales.blogspot.com/
These images provoke memory.
Now your walking in my shoes. Those images really appeal to me and I have no idea why. Industrial ruins..http://tunneltales.blogspot.com/
Sunday, 9 May 2010
Usually 
I didn't feel nervous, but I did at this moment. Unlce John still had hold of my hand as he placed the key in the lock of the chemists shop door. As it opened I entered a whole new world.
Dark wooden floors, wall to wall glass cabinets filled with so many colourful bottles and boxes. I gazed around, slowly trying to breathe it all in.
Most of the shop was chemists but on the right hand side was a serving counter with dark wooden worktops, brass weighing scales and huge grey till. In the glass cabinets at the side were sweets, rows upon rows of of sweets from Mojo's and Black Jacks to penny arrowe bars and Lucky Bags. The jars behind the counter were filled to the brim with pineapple chunks,pears drops, dolly mixtures. On and on they went row after row. My stomache was filling up with dancing butterflies until my gaze stopped at the end of the counter. A huge metal drum sat proudly with a lid on. Uncle John could see my gaze change to curiosity as I stared at this thing. He began to grin as we walked towards it. As we got near he dropped my hand to switch it on. My hand fell limply by my side and l felt very uneasy and a little cold and disconnected. While he had hold of me l felt safe and good, but here l was standing alone in a closed chemist shop surrounded by all sorts of things, the floor beneath my feet began to sway gently.As the floor swayed I could hear the creaking of the floor boards and the smell of the river for a second I was transported back into the room near the river when my mother was at work. The strange clinical smell of the shop filled my nose then my head until I floated away into darkness.
ENDING No. 1
When I woke I found myself on a huge, warm, comfy sofa with lots of cushions. The room felt warm as the sun poured in. I lay still with my eyes open just gazing around until a cat appeared at the sofa and arched its back waiting to be stroked. I leant over and gently ran my fingers along its back and it arched even more as it began to purr.
In the back ground I could hear voices, a man and woman talking quitely. The cat jumped up onto my legs and I sat up to stroke it. As I sat up I could see over the top of the sofa. I was in a huge, sunny lounge with a wall full of windows allowing the sun to pour in. There were flowers in vases and it smelt fresh and homely.
Unlce John walked into the room saying " hello, welcome back. I think it's all been a bit too much for you young lady. Now stay there and I will bring you a cup of tea".
The cat curled up on my legs, I couldn't move now but it was a lovely feeling her tummy moving up and down as she purred happily.
Uncle John arrived accompanied by a tall ,elegant lady with dark brown eyes and dark hair piled high on the back of her head.I gazed at her as she carried the tea tray toward sme. She smiled broadly at me and her eyes gleamed. I was beginning to feel a lot better now.
Unlce John introduced her as Aunty Catherine, his wife.We all sat and she poured the tea. I tried to move my legs to sit up but the cat had different ideas, he was comfy.Uncle John lifted a limp, unhappy cat down onto the floor, which allowed me to sit up next to him and drink the hot sweet tea.
Uncle John said there was so much to tell me but he thoughtI had had enough excitement for one day. So we chatted happily about their life here in the chemists shop in Rock Ferry. About some of the colourful characters that came into the shop and a little about Rock Ferry itself and how they had arranged an appointment at Rock Ferry High School about a place for me there.It sounded grand. Eventauuly Aunt Catherine said that dinner would be ready soon and would I like to go into the chemist shop and chose ice cream for dessert.
Suddenly it all came flooding back, the swaying wooden floor the smell and that huge, ugly, noisey machine at the end of the counter.I felt the colour drain from my face as my hands became clammy and cold.
"hey whats the matter, come on its allright. You dont have to go if you dont want to, what is it, whats the matter love?".
I held my head down upon my chest as I mumbled that I was a little frightened by the big metal machine with the thundering sound.
Uncle John began to smile as he looked towards Aunt Catherine. She walked towards me brushing some hair back off my face saying that I was the first child not to like their machine and usually after school the children queued up in the shop waiting for Unlce John to switch it on and make the 'candy floss'.
My heart raced 'Candy Floss', wow mylife oculdnt be better and with that i grabbedhis hand saying " lets get the ice cream and can I see the candy floss machine please.
I didn't feel nervous, but I did at this moment. Unlce John still had hold of my hand as he placed the key in the lock of the chemists shop door. As it opened I entered a whole new world.Dark wooden floors, wall to wall glass cabinets filled with so many colourful bottles and boxes. I gazed around, slowly trying to breathe it all in.
Most of the shop was chemists but on the right hand side was a serving counter with dark wooden worktops, brass weighing scales and huge grey till. In the glass cabinets at the side were sweets, rows upon rows of of sweets from Mojo's and Black Jacks to penny arrowe bars and Lucky Bags. The jars behind the counter were filled to the brim with pineapple chunks,pears drops, dolly mixtures. On and on they went row after row. My stomache was filling up with dancing butterflies until my gaze stopped at the end of the counter. A huge metal drum sat proudly with a lid on. Uncle John could see my gaze change to curiosity as I stared at this thing. He began to grin as we walked towards it. As we got near he dropped my hand to switch it on. My hand fell limply by my side and l felt very uneasy and a little cold and disconnected. While he had hold of me l felt safe and good, but here l was standing alone in a closed chemist shop surrounded by all sorts of things, the floor beneath my feet began to sway gently.As the floor swayed I could hear the creaking of the floor boards and the smell of the river for a second I was transported back into the room near the river when my mother was at work. The strange clinical smell of the shop filled my nose then my head until I floated away into darkness.
ENDING No. 1
When I woke I found myself on a huge, warm, comfy sofa with lots of cushions. The room felt warm as the sun poured in. I lay still with my eyes open just gazing around until a cat appeared at the sofa and arched its back waiting to be stroked. I leant over and gently ran my fingers along its back and it arched even more as it began to purr.
In the back ground I could hear voices, a man and woman talking quitely. The cat jumped up onto my legs and I sat up to stroke it. As I sat up I could see over the top of the sofa. I was in a huge, sunny lounge with a wall full of windows allowing the sun to pour in. There were flowers in vases and it smelt fresh and homely.
Unlce John walked into the room saying " hello, welcome back. I think it's all been a bit too much for you young lady. Now stay there and I will bring you a cup of tea".
The cat curled up on my legs, I couldn't move now but it was a lovely feeling her tummy moving up and down as she purred happily.
Uncle John arrived accompanied by a tall ,elegant lady with dark brown eyes and dark hair piled high on the back of her head.I gazed at her as she carried the tea tray toward sme. She smiled broadly at me and her eyes gleamed. I was beginning to feel a lot better now.
Unlce John introduced her as Aunty Catherine, his wife.We all sat and she poured the tea. I tried to move my legs to sit up but the cat had different ideas, he was comfy.Uncle John lifted a limp, unhappy cat down onto the floor, which allowed me to sit up next to him and drink the hot sweet tea.
Uncle John said there was so much to tell me but he thoughtI had had enough excitement for one day. So we chatted happily about their life here in the chemists shop in Rock Ferry. About some of the colourful characters that came into the shop and a little about Rock Ferry itself and how they had arranged an appointment at Rock Ferry High School about a place for me there.It sounded grand. Eventauuly Aunt Catherine said that dinner would be ready soon and would I like to go into the chemist shop and chose ice cream for dessert.
Suddenly it all came flooding back, the swaying wooden floor the smell and that huge, ugly, noisey machine at the end of the counter.I felt the colour drain from my face as my hands became clammy and cold.
"hey whats the matter, come on its allright. You dont have to go if you dont want to, what is it, whats the matter love?".
I held my head down upon my chest as I mumbled that I was a little frightened by the big metal machine with the thundering sound.
Uncle John began to smile as he looked towards Aunt Catherine. She walked towards me brushing some hair back off my face saying that I was the first child not to like their machine and usually after school the children queued up in the shop waiting for Unlce John to switch it on and make the 'candy floss'.
My heart raced 'Candy Floss', wow mylife oculdnt be better and with that i grabbedhis hand saying " lets get the ice cream and can I see the candy floss machine please.
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